Looking for the real dirt on your favorite costume-clad celebs? You’re in the right place, as the delectable Rosie Knight keeps us on top of the fights, flings and latest DCU gossip in this sensationally savage column.
Well, my darlings, congrats! You've officially made it through the first half of 2024, and if you're reading this then it means you probably haven't been kidnapped by Brainaic (unless they've got great Wi-Fi on that Skull Ship) or murdered by a Lobo-bro (Lobros?).
Yes, it's been a rough few months in the DC Universe, and I feel things are only going to get worse in the months ahead. So, I thought it might be nice to take a break from all that and celebrate the smorgasbord of queer heroes venturing to the furthest reaches of our fabulous universe in DC Pride 2024 #1. From killer mushrooms to romantic rendezvous, I've been hearing all kinds of rumors about some of our favorite alphabet buddies, and I'm here to bless you with all that Pride Month gossip right now!
STORY: Poison Ivy Serves Some Justice in Mushroom Madness!
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Numerous sources have confirmed that Dr. Pamela Isley has been tripping through the Multiverse on the hunt for some rare mushrooms that will make even the most steadfast of psyches see their gods.
Look, I’m the biggest #HarlIvy hashtagger out there, so don’t take this as a slight against our favorite plant mom. But I saw god just last week after I ate some mushroom pizza in the cafeteria that must have been sitting out too long and you didn't hear me making a big hullabaloo about it! Also, Janet-from-HR didn't do anything a damn thing for me, but okay, sure, she has plenty of time to accompany Poison Ivy on a romantic journey to Portworld to procure some long-extinct fungi. Bureaucracy at its finest, I guess.
Anyway, I hear that multiple class action lawsuits are currently being filed in a variety of courts throughout different realities accusing the good doctor of malpractice. And by malpractice, I mean forcing bigots to go on the trips of their lifetimes after involuntarily ingesting the super-shrooms that Ivy painstakingly hunted down. I hope she has a sympathetic jury and a good lawyer (or a lenient judge who's not allergic to mushrooms) because this will certainly be a tough conviction to dodge. With that said, I'm sure she would do it all over again if given the chance and we would all be rooting (yes, I said it) her on.
ITEM: Natasha Irons Steels Herself for an Uncomfortable Reunion
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I wouldn't usually spend my time writing about the love lives of teenage heroes, but I wanted to focus on something a little more positive this month. Besides, it’s only been a few years since I was teen myself. (You all know that, RIGHT?) So, my little birds at Traci 13's Pride party informed me that Natasha Irons decided to celebrate the magical rainbow month by making amends with the mystical host herself.
Although the hostess with the mostess wasn't expecting Natasha to show up, the pair did manage to make amends after Steel Jr. apologized for ghosting her fellow hero for some of those bigger name supes.
You know we've all been there. Besides, who wouldn't leave their girlfriend at home to spend some quality time with Raven? But this elder queer is proud of the girls for such brave and bold communication. Next time, why don’t you stretch those communication skills just a bit farther and reach out to your pal Rosie with a party invite? Thanks, besties!
SCOOP: Jackson Hyde Has a New Water-Loving Beau
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The newest Aquaman on the block (if your block happens to be the seven oceans covering the majority of our planet) has a new flame! Ha’Wea is his name and wooing Jackson Hyde is his game. As reported to me by several different fish who saw it firsthand, I can safely say that 1) talking to fish is incredibly underrated, they're very interesting, and 2) Jackson and Ha’Wea have just locked it down and made it official. That's right, if you still had your sights set on dating the Lad of Liquid (hmm, not my finest nickname), sorry, but you missed your chance. These fellas are feeling the love and it looks like this is only going to get more serious from here on out.
As an aside, a rather talkative fish who unintentionally stowed away in Jackson's pocket recently managed to end up in New Genesis. (Yes, even underwater super suits have pockets apparently, but can I get a halfway decent pair of jeans with them? No, apparently that’s asking for far too much.) Anyhow, the fish, whose name is Terrence, informed me that New Genesis has endless Pride parties happening on loop. Have we all been sleeping on this up-and-coming hotbed of celebration? I'm currently asking my trusty travel agent to look into it and get back to me with some potential vacation packages. If it's as good as Terrence-boy said, then I may need to visit three to four times just to make sure I'm experiencing the full scope of what New Genesis has to offer. So, it looks like you can officially mark this story as developing with more to come.
Speaking of Pride parties, I’d better leave before I miss out on Constantine's. Last year, I had one too many frosés and got lost in the Bleed. I had to rely on Jenny Sparks to get me out—it was a whole thing. This year, I’m plus-oneing with my new pal Terrence and I’ll happily settle for getting some more sexy scoops for you lovely folks! So, this is Rosie Knight signing off, just remember to spread the word…as long as you tell me first!
DC Pride 2024 #1 is now available in comic shops and can be read in full on DC UNIVERSE INFINITE.
Rosie Knight is an award-winning journalist and author who loves Swamp Thing, the DC Cosmic and writing the monthly gossip column here at DC.com. You can also listen to her waxing lyrical about comics, movies and more each week as she co-hosts Crooked Media's pop-culture podcast, X-Ray Vision.
NOTE: The views and opinions expressed in this feature are solely those of Rosie Knight and do not necessarily reflect those of DC or Warner Bros. Discovery, nor should they be read as confirmation or denial of future DC plans.